Learning from a Retired Counselor


What I learned from a retired counselor:

I am the center of my universe and everything revolves around me!  Everything! I can’t tolerate the idea that ANYONE would consider rejecting me for any reason, because I am perfect!  I deserve to be adored and catered to and understood immediately without any effort. And if it’s not going to happen my way, I have the right to SUFFER as long as I want to. And the universe had better notice.  Because I AM SIGNIFICANT—and My STORY MATTERS!!

Even if not a lick of it is true.

I’m addicted to a fairy tale I created that had an ending from the very first day.  It verifies the drama of my existence as someone who cannot be loved completely, who is afraid of being criticized and rejected, who will never be good enough,  and who will always disappoint.

And the pain I am in is perfectly natural and necessary for recovery from my own childish fantasy, which needs to die completely.

This is not the first time I have been made aware of what I am going through.  Anthony L. Dickens Alderman and Melissa Dickens Alderman both warned me with love and a whole lot of grace that this is in fact what a break up is all about.

How long does it last?

The counselor promised that I’ll know from the inside when I am finished.  He also reminded me that I am actually whole and complete right now. It’s just that I don’t see myself that way because of the story I made up about me.  So he recommended that I start having some fun around my own insanity by making it into the cosmic joke it really is. It’ll all go away eventually. So that’s why I’m sharing here.

Meanwhile, keep focusing on making a difference until the distractions disappear.

And get back to love.

It’s much more satisfying—-especially when coming from the internal flow of the heart.

(This would be called reality therapy—with a punch.  I kind of like it! I can’t wait to create something real when this foolishness is

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