Being Present.

Sometimes the best option is simply to be present.  Not thinking about the past.  Not contemplating the future.  Not considering what the heck is being said or not said.  Taking things as they come and as they don't come.  I find myself being at peace more frequently when I can maintin this status.  I can choose to go with the flow without concern.  And when something shows up in my space, like hurt or shame, I can choose to swallow it or spit it out without worry about the ramifications.  Usually, I'm learning, that what's there is simply something in my head that has little or nothing to do with what is actually happening. 

This idea of being present clearly doesn't make much sense.  There's no room for justification for all I've gone through so far.  Nor is there room for decision making about the future.  In fact, there seems to be little or no reason for all the fuss.  I get along quite well with this person when I'm present.  And I see no clear reason for being somewhere different. 

At least until he says something critical.   Then I forget about being present rather quickly and have to get back there somehow in order to move forward.  And all is well again. 

Being present is NOT denial.  It's simply having no clue about the future and being okay with it.  And oddly, there's freedom and peace.